This post is rated M.
This morning, my Scottish man and I talked about ‘getting drunk’ and ‘our health’. I showed him my ignorance, by asking “Why would girls go to the night clubs or parties, wearing nice pretty dresses and put make up to make them look pretty. But then, they end up getting drunk as a result of taking drugs and alcohol in the clubs or parties. It is so sad that they only want to look pretty when entering the building. They do not care to look ugly and miserable when leaving the building.” He told me this is not about being pretty and healthy. It is more about looking good and having fun. He told me that some girls want to get drunk to enjoy the night. Some guys want them to get drunk, thus these girl will show no inhibition doing after-club/party-sex.
I don’t understand.
My Scottish man told me that mostly girls restrain to show their rights to sex desire and thus participate passively in sex-making. The old idea that good girls have to be submissive and should let their partner ‘lead’ the game remains (He said this, which I translated in Indonesia: “cewek-cewek kebanyakan hanya tidur dan ngangkang).
I, then, asked him: “Do men like submissive girls like that?” – he said: No. Is he honest? I don’t know. But after my conversation with him, I recall friends’ stories about ‘perempuan baik-baik tidak binal di tempat tidur’.
Then my question, so socially, men are allowed to be ‘binal’ on the bed? Why?